Having three kids so far is amazing. And by amazing, I mean exhausting. It’s amazhausting. What’s that? That made-up word is lame? That took me five minutes of staring at the wall to come up with...If you can do better, get your own blog!
Sorry, that cyber-snap must be my cyber-horrormones going haywire.
Going from two to three children is like the difference between Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy. Wheel of Fortune is for the average-intelligent American, but Jeopardy takes it to the next level. You can flesh out that analogy how you want; but am I implying that it takes a genius to have three kids? Yes. Yes I am.
Here is an update on each of my family members to give you a glimpse into the chaos:
Oldest dear daughter (ODD)(this acronym is fitting if you know her...she is awesome, by the way):
My oldest is five and she is bouncing off the walls. Have you ever seen Stuart from MadTV? That is who she reminds me of at this point. Of course, I know it is just a cry for attention, and so is the constant biting of nails and the picking of the nose and eating the boogers (your kids WILL do it too if they haven’t already!). Either that last part is for attention or she really likes the taste. I hope it is just for attention. On top of that, she got an ear infection and the only way I knew that was she kept saying ‘What?’ after everything we said. Here is a sample of how our current conversations go:
ODD: Look what I can do! (while hopping on one foot or contorting her body in some strange way)
Me: Wow! (that exclamation point is not heard in my tone of voice) (Two minutes later) Stop picking your nose or get a kleenex!
ODD: What?
Rinse and repeat 80 times today.
Youngest dear daughter:
She is 18 months now going on ten years old as evidenced by her tweenie attitude. No really, she is the sweetest girl you will ever meet, but for some reason lately likes to cross her arms and pout like Veruca Salt. The past few days she has had some messy diapers, that we found out about AFTER Rob was throwing her up in the air. Nuff said.
Son:
He is now two weeks old. He acts like he is two weeks old, i.e., he cries a lot. And a loud cry, too. There is not much to say about life with him yet other than I found myself drumming our old high school marching band cadence on his back while trying to get a burp out. That made the frequent burping slightly more interesting. Oh, and diaper changes after having two girls are also much more interesting, too.
Sorry, that cyber-snap must be my cyber-horrormones going haywire.
Going from two to three children is like the difference between Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy. Wheel of Fortune is for the average-intelligent American, but Jeopardy takes it to the next level. You can flesh out that analogy how you want; but am I implying that it takes a genius to have three kids? Yes. Yes I am.
Here is an update on each of my family members to give you a glimpse into the chaos:
Oldest dear daughter (ODD)(this acronym is fitting if you know her...she is awesome, by the way):
My oldest is five and she is bouncing off the walls. Have you ever seen Stuart from MadTV? That is who she reminds me of at this point. Of course, I know it is just a cry for attention, and so is the constant biting of nails and the picking of the nose and eating the boogers (your kids WILL do it too if they haven’t already!). Either that last part is for attention or she really likes the taste. I hope it is just for attention. On top of that, she got an ear infection and the only way I knew that was she kept saying ‘What?’ after everything we said. Here is a sample of how our current conversations go:
ODD: Look what I can do! (while hopping on one foot or contorting her body in some strange way)
Me: Wow! (that exclamation point is not heard in my tone of voice) (Two minutes later) Stop picking your nose or get a kleenex!
ODD: What?
Rinse and repeat 80 times today.
Youngest dear daughter:
She is 18 months now going on ten years old as evidenced by her tweenie attitude. No really, she is the sweetest girl you will ever meet, but for some reason lately likes to cross her arms and pout like Veruca Salt. The past few days she has had some messy diapers, that we found out about AFTER Rob was throwing her up in the air. Nuff said.
Son:
He is now two weeks old. He acts like he is two weeks old, i.e., he cries a lot. And a loud cry, too. There is not much to say about life with him yet other than I found myself drumming our old high school marching band cadence on his back while trying to get a burp out. That made the frequent burping slightly more interesting. Oh, and diaper changes after having two girls are also much more interesting, too.
Husband:
He is such a help with the kids. Sometimes I know he needs to get out, though, even if it is to the corner store just to buy a Diet Pepsi. Or creamer. Or a pack of gum. Or anything to have thirteen minutes without whines to quench or butts to wipe. Thanks babe! These days won’t last forever! And don’t forget to pick me up peanut M&Ms!
Me:
My post-three-babies-body is interesting. Don’t tell me I’m pear-shaped now, that sounds too flattering. I’m more like that yellow male squash from Veggie Tales. There, I’m less flattering now. I’ve got more rolls than a Greek diner (rimshot). That is my only attempt to be Rodney Dangerfield in this post.
(Sidenote: I Googled ‘ba dum ching’ to find out what that sound is called and it gave me rimshot. Genius. I think Google could handle three kids.)
I’m breastfeeding though, again, so that should help with the weight issue. Although, breastfeeding comes with its own challenges. Right now my son is making a suckling noise with his mouth while sleeping and my body instantly turned tense. Really, again? How many times does this kid need to eat?!
Most of the time I am covered in bodily fluids that are not my own (that’s what she said). Showers are hard to come by, and so is time alone. And so is a sense of humor, that’s why I try to find funny things in all situations. For example, our younger daughter was standing on the diaper changing table and fell off head first, but Rob caught her before she hit the floor. I
And that is the tale of the Cordell family, where diapers are a-plenty, laundry is a constant, and quietness is nowhere to be found. But amid all of the chaos, there is plenty of love to go round.
I love reading your blogs! Its nice to know that us mothers are NOT alone, and we can all understand each other more than we think!!
ReplyDelete